Burn Black

That ain't a vulture, that's a fucking pigeon…

Archive of ‘Life’ category

5 Months Later…

…And it seems I’m back.  What have I been up to to warrant such neglect of this blog?  Quite a lot actually.  Been working lots, have been recovering from surgery, been tattooed, started going to the gym again, started smoking again, decorated my kitchen, celebrated Christmas and my birthday, made some marmalade, spent loads of money on vinyl and pretty much thats it in a nutshell.

How about you?

I am going to try my best in future with updating.  We shall see how that goes.

Last Saturday a few of us went to The Coquette Collective‘s Burlesque Show and since I hardly get to go out thought I’d go all out.  After trawling the internet I found this lady’s YouTube channel and decided to try and pin curl my hair.  For first attempts I was pretty proud of myself and my fella’s efforts as I had to get him to do the back for me.  I went to sleep with them in on the Friday night and went to work with a scarf on my head the next day.  I definitely think I’ll be doing this again in future.  Also kudos to Superdrugs who have a lot of vegan friendly toiletries these days.  I bought some old lady setting lotion from there and not only is it BUAV approved but vegan friendly too.  Boom.


The older I’m getting the more I’ve slowly been reducing the amount of cigarettes I smoke.  Whilst at uni it wasn’t uncommon for me to go through 20 a day, more if I went out drinking in the evening (no smoking ban then however).  Back in 2007-2008 I successfully quit smoking for 9-10 months until the stresses of coming out of an 8-9 year relationship and finishing my degree became too much and I stupidly picked up the evil weed again.  I’ve smoked ever since, despite a few attempts here and there to quit that haven’t lasted more than a few weeks.

As of late anything up to 10 a day was considered the norm, 20 if I went out, maybe less.  Nowadays I can easily not smoke on a day to day basis and the only time temptation ever rears it’s head is when alcohol is involved.  These days I’m finding this excuse pitiful however and what with me also cutting down on the amount of alcohol I consume (I’m 33 and hangovers are just not funny anymore, not when they can last up to 3 days) figured it’s high time to end my relationship with the fags.  I’ve tried patches, gum, etc. in the past but this time I’m finding the good old “Cold Turkey” method is working just fine.  I say this but I will be taking some gum out with me next time I go out socialising.  I have no idea why I can’t let go of this booze + snouts = HEAVEN equation, maybe I just think “everything to excess” when it comes to alcohol.  I can’t go straight edge, nor do I want to so any suggestions would be welcomed.  I’ll have been “smoke free” for 3 weeks come Friday.  In honesty it’s been a piece of piss but then again I’ve only had two G&T’s and a glass of wine in all of that time.

p.s. The Stoptober app is rubbish.  I’ve signed up to it twice now and still haven’t received an email.  The app keeps crashing whenever I open it on my phone too.I can’t believe someone will have been paid a fortune for that.

Gallbladder Woes…

At the beginning of the year I suffered my first gallstone attack and a scan back in January more or less confirmed that I needed to get my gallbladder removed.  In the time since I’ve started going to the gym and watching what I ate.  I went back to a vegetarian diet (actually I’m practically vegan these days) and I’ve lost over a stone in weight which is all great steps for healthy living in my book but I still suffered from these attacks with each one being more painful then the last.  At the beginning of August my boyfriend and I went out to see a friends band one Friday night and ended up in A&E after an attack caught me off guard.  Still free morphine and I was *just* well enough to go to Bloodstock the next weekend which was nice.


A couple of weeks later I ended up in A&E again only this time via ambulance and not taxi.  This time I was kept in overnight and sufficiently doped up to the eyeballs (best high of my life hahaha).  The next day I was asked if I would like my gallbladder took out that day.  My reply “HELL YEAH!!!!” and so I’ve been recovering ever since, missing out on a trip to London and a Lady Gaga gig in the process.  This is my last week on sick leave and yes it has been nice to relax and not have to worry if each mouthful of food was going to create agonising pain but fuck me I’m bored now.  My flat has never been so clean, also I’m purely on the bones of my arse due to being on sick so I literally cannot wait to get back to work and earn some moolah.

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Shopping in Newcastle…

Ahhh good ol Instagram.

Music Monday: Red Hot Chili Peppers – Love Rollercoaster.

I finally, after 20 years of waiting got to see the R.H.C.P. live, and in my hometown to boot. The tickets were ridiculously priced (at nearly £60) but I got to see 4 bands for that and I paid zero in transport since the Stadium of Light is about 30 minutes walk from my house. Reverend and The Makers were the band of the day for me, The Futureheads were good and it was nice to finally see them live, The Wombats I’m afraid I didn’t paid much attention too and the Chilli’s were good and I enjoyed myself. They played their cover of “Higher Ground” so I was happy.

Foodie Pen Pals: May 2012.

Back in April I was shown a site for Foodie Pen Pals by one of my friends who knows how much I enjoy cooking and baking.  Thinking it would be a lot of fun I signed up.  I was told who I had to send a parcel for, I stalked her blog/twitter for inspiration, bought some treats and sent them off along with some home made goodies.  I then sat back and waited for my parcel to arrive, only 2 weeks later and nothing.  I’ve tried emailing my sender in case she’s ill or if it’s gone missing in the post and yet again, nothing.

I would have loved to post a blog entry with loads of photo’s of awesome goodies like what my recipient did but I doubt I’ll get the chance as my gut feeling is telling me to give up as it’s just not going to happen.  The whole experience has left me feeling pretty upset and bitter truth be told.  I work part time for minimum wage and my parcel, along with p&p cost over £18.  It’s not Carol Anne’s fault as she’s been trying to chase this up as well and it’s certainly not Emma’s either.  The last remaining glimmer of hope is thinking positively that something good happens in the next few days otherwise I doubt I’ll be willing to contribute towards future months.  I just can’t afford to do so, both mentally and financially.

The Devil and Idle Hands…

It’s been hectic as of late I’ll give it that.  You wouldn’t think I’ve just came back from a week in Spain.  Literally all I did there was eat, drink and with the exception of a jaunt to Barcelona one day, pretty much remained horizontal with a fag/Gin in one hand and my Kindle in the other (Yeah I’m smoking again).  The weather was glorious and it’s good to know that my GCSE in Spanish, along with any swear words I’ve picked up on on the way still serve me well.


On the way home I hammered the Duty Free and bought the Naked palette by Urban Decay.  I’ve had it nearly 2 weeks now and in that time I haven’t even looked at any of my other eyeshadows.  This is how pleased I am with it.  What’s also good to note is that my eye makeup has never looked the same in all of those days too.  The brush is ace and the shadows themselves have A LOT of pigment in them and so last all day and blend into each other beautifully.  All in all I’m over the moon with it which is just in time considering my long time love affair with M.A.C. is now officially over.

I’ve used M.A.C. for pretty much all of my adult life purely because I a) was (well still am) a massive goth and the colour shades available were like nothing else I’d ever seen at the time, b) I knew that M.A.C. never tested on animals and c) their customer service was always great.  Most things however must come to an end it would seem.  The last few times I’ve visited their counters have been sub standard in terms of customer service.  Friends have said the same with one friend even emailing a complaint to M.A.C. only to receive a generic standard reply back.

Where once their stance on animal testing was a solid “we do not test on animals” it is now  “The Estee Lauder Companies Inc. is committed to the elimination of animal testing. We are equally committed to consumer health and safety and bringing to market products that comply with applicable regulations in every country in which are products are sold”, which is a total sell out in my eyes.  The main reason behind this change of heart?  Well it seems that M.A.C. are now trading in China which require, under some arcane law that every single ingredient/product must be tested on animals before it goes on sale.  I feel betrayed if im honest, and angry.  It’s ridiculous to think that in this day and age companies, who once prided themselves on being against animal testing are now going back on this just to make a bit of extra cash and are quite happy to piss off a lot of their regular customers in doing so.  Therefore it’s time for other companies such as Urban Decay and E.L.F. (who are cheap as chips and vegan friendly to boot) to fill the M.A.C. shaped void left in my make up box.  I’ve also been intrigued by Illamasqua for a while too so I highly doubt I’ll be missing out.

This all came about around the same time that Lush (who I work for and who have a very strong anti animal testing policy and have no shops in China for the very same reasons I’ve mentioned above) launched their Against Animal Testing campaign.  If you haven’t already signed the petition then I urge you to do so here.

Sub Dermal Ink Injections…

Anyone who knows me in real life will have noticed the huge tattoo that covers all of my right arm. It’s been a work in progress by Bez at Triplesix Studios for over 3 years and back in January it was finally completed. It’s took just over 100 hours in total and a lot of name calling on my part but it’s ace and I love it. It was entered in the Female Sleeve category at the recent Peterlee Convention and it won which was rather nice. I now just have to get all of the lasering done on my other arm so that we can get cracking on that one now.



I found out at the end of last year that I have gallstones after two hideous attacks that left me crippled in agony and as weak as a kitten.  One night the pain was that bad I ended up in my local A&E.  Therefore with impending surgery on the horizon I’m in dire need to shift some weight and overall become a healthier, fitter person (better late than never eh?).

I already do kickboxing (I’ve got an orange belt – babysteps innit) but since I’ve moved house and due to my finishing times at work I’ve found it difficult to get back into the swing of it which is a shame really as I love it.  It’s the only exercise I’ve ever did where not only have I sweated buckets and ached all over but more importantly I’ve enjoyed, plus learning to kick the shit out of any would be assailant is always a handy skill to know in my book.  One of the things on my list to do this week is to rectify this so I can go back as I love the club I go to.  The instructor and everyone who goes are top notch and super friendly.

Alongside this a friend started going to bootcamp sessions three times a week and invited me to tag along.  I hate the cold so this didn’t sound appealing whatsoever but a month later and she’s looking a lot better for it and with advertising like that I decided to at least try it and went along last night.  Frightened by the weather I had leggings on under my tracksuit bottoms and on my top half wore a vest, t-shirt, long sleeved t-shirt and a hoodie.  When we arrived I was freezing and remained so until I had to start jogging around a huge field in the pitch dark.

It got worse from then on and then easier(ish).  I did slowly warm up and I got to do some sparring which made me happy (and more determined to get back to kickboxing).  The well earned long soak in attempts to warm up once I’d returned home was well worth too.

However I woke up this morning and deary me.  I ache.  My ankles, shoulders, and back all hurt.  It’s that weird good hurt however that appeals to the masochist in me so yeah I do think I’ll go again because I feel, like anything, it’ll get better/easier the more I go.  No idea if I can commit to it 3 times a week but going at least once a week has got to be better than not going at all.

Home Sweet Home…

I’ve been rather quiet as of late I know.  This is purely because I’ve recently moved home and am no longer residing at FCHQ.  Service will probably resume once my life has returned to a state of normality.

My New Bathroom.